Sorrow

My heart has been hurting lately… hurting because I don’t know how to make sense of tragedy. I probably will never be able to make sense of it. In my human eyes, I cannot understand some of the trials people have to face and some of the decisions people choose to make.

Last Friday, I got a phone call from my Aunt sharing the awful news that an eight-year-old boy in my gran’s community died because of a tragic accident. When she called I immediately thought someone had died in my family. I won’t describe the details of this awful tragedy but I will say that my cousins and aunts and uncles and my grandma and other members of the community in Ashton banded together to save this little boy and he passed away. He was eight-years old and my cousin Hank’s best friend.

My heart breaks for the family who lost this precious eight-year-old boy. I can’t stand thinking about his parents who have to face a closet full of clothes and toys that belonged to their precious son. I cry when I think about the siblings of this little guy that won’t share the laughs and love that I get to experience with my sibling. I hurt when I think of the cousins that won’t find a best friend in him. I simply ache for this family and don’t understand why this had to happen.

Then on Monday as I sat in the materials room on campus preparing for a session my friend and fellow graduate student Katie came in with a somber look on her face and I could tell something was wrong. She told me the news about the Boston Marathon bombings. Immediately, my heart broke. She shared how she knew multiple people running and watching the race that were on her triathlon team at Boston University and then I felt very close to the situation. Someone who I have grown to respect and love was hurting because of the act of a person to create a bomb to hurt other people.

As the reports came in of the deaths that had occurred at the marathon, one of them hit close to home. There was a Boston University graduate student who had died. This could have been our athletic Katie. This graduate student will miss out walking at graduation and celebrating her accomplishment. A family who loves her will miss her desperately. Her journey has been cut short. I do not understand why this had to happen.

So like I said…

My heart hurts.

I know that the families affected will find comfort. I know that they will see their children again. I know that these individuals whose lives got cut short will someday soon feel the joy that they missed out on. I know this because I know we have a Savior and a Heavenly Father who love us and are merciful. Although, I know this it doesn’t help the hurt sometimes. My brother stated so eloquently in a letter sent home that “sorrow is a Christ-like quality”. To be able to feel sorrow for and with others is Christ-like.